Can't stop loving Bowie!!

Never forget the man who knew how to push boundaries and just be himself!!! 

When the sex is pretentious....

I don’t know what is happening with guys these days. Before  I go further , I am not out to man bash…just bash idiot men. The ones who are so pretentious that you can hear their conceit from a mile away.   What are these guys thinking…oh wait..I know. They are thinking “I’m awesome and you’re lucky I’m a live”. Even the sex is pretentious. He is so into what he considers pleasuring you—it’s a weird combination of facial expressions, odd bendy moves and him grunting “that’s good right” …hahahahaha…no, it’s really not funny.  It’s actually kind of sad. There has been a rush to blame porn for giving them unrealistic ideas of what a good lay is.  I don’t blame porn though, I blame arrogance. And not the usual arrogance, but the kind of arrogance that makes you think you’re better than a porn star and know so much about what makes someone feel good that you don’t need to ask (or take instruction).  

It sickens me to think that women and men have been subjected to this and leave the situation under satisfied. The solution is simple. Stop that shit in progress. This does take confidence and the comfort knowing that your partner is not keep going.  but you could always finish unsatisfied and not call him again. Whatever your tactic, stick to it.  you’ll gradually become more assertive and these men will gradually learn that their options are limited when they are assholes. 

Besides, there is so much better stuff out there, why settle for pretentious sex.

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Single on a Saturday: Oh that Cats of Two..

I have finally recovered. Now let’s talk Saturday.

So 2CatsCocktail lounge was a favorite hotspot of mine many moons ago. I took a break from it for a few years. Then they renovated and once again my love for it has begun to flourish. I have mentioned it a few times in these blogs, but this time it needs its own space.

There is no bar that leads to memory loss as much as 2Cats has.  I wake up safely at 9am at home in my PJs, but I remember nothing. Absolutely nothing.

Sunday morning, as I was reconnecting with the party mates re:the night before, they both tossed around a new sort-of slogan: 2Cats is the blackhole of Toronto…You remember going in, but never coming out. Interesting. I keep saying we need a video camera or take more selfies, just to retrace the night.

Its always a good time at 2Cats and you just forget that you are drinking liquor. This is the place for social people. Even in its new expanded form it is crowded in all of the right spots. The dance floor is where you make it and everyone is ok with that. You’re always chatting to the people near you, smile as you push past the crowd to the bathroom. ..oh and the best part is that there is never a bathroom line!!!!! I think I would have just as much fun while sober there, but life’s a celebration filled with fine wine (and vodka). Good times had by all- the perfect recipe for forgetting.

When I look back I only stopped going because of the line up. Now I only go if it is a  pre-set destination (I will no longer bar hop on King West. Not worth the time waiting in lines). I go out earlier and get back home sooner….hahaha or so is the plan, but that never happens. I get there at 10:30 and still troll home at past 4am..I actually was walking out there carrying my shoes…Arctic Monkeys fans will get that one. I got in a cab and came home…

Or so I assume.

Review: Mixology

So I officially think that "Mixology" is the best show on earth. It feels like I'm watching my nights in action. For those not in the know, "Mixology" is a show about picking at the bar. One night, that goes for a few episodes. Its that night you had that time and you're retelling it to a buddy. It's a unique way to look at the bar scene and cannot hate on lines such as: "I'm not just some guy, I'm a man that wants to make sweet ass love to you."
The best part comes at the end when they are all trying to finalize their evening booties. "You gotta get the ice cream home before it melts" ....yes...they said what we are all thinking. By the end of the night you have worked so hard for that pick up and you need to recognize there is a small window of opportunity. I did not specify a time in my previous post  but the show pins it at 8 mins. You have to leave the venue in 8 minutes after agreeing to go home together....there you go...the window is 8 minutes.

Thanks Mixiology.

I wonder if there is enough material for a second season....

Single on a Saturday: Goodbye my little friend

Like watching a child go to
school for the first time

No, no one died.

I got rid of my XPole. The piece of equipment that I worked hard to get. After months of research, I saved up that $450 and ordered this lovely tool. Adjustable, removable, spinner….ahh…pole delight.

I kept it up in my other apartment and used it regularly. Then I moved and it never saw light again.

I needed to find it a good home and word of mouth spread. A trust worthy party place has now taken her on.  They get to dust her off and give her a good romp at the club. Perhaps we will hang out once again…but for now I am planning to pick up a membership at Brass Vixens to get my pole fill.

Stay tuned....Saturday Night Shenanigans return next weekend...My Vegas Easter Birthday!!

Single on a Saturday: Casual sex done right!

Picture it:

You spend the night at your house with a friend. Going through the wine..and whatever other contraband you enjoy..then comes bed time..pick whichever time works for you- 1am…7am…what ever. The rest is good. Ah yes…score to the single gal…or guy. That at home nookie is great. No worries about a cab or cover or waiting in line. No need to create a pick up plan. That friend is in your home. Drinking with you…and then you bed.

Then you get up. The other side is empty.

For the most part you breathe fresh air, happy that you didn’t have to kick anyone out…but then you hear the water. Perhaps it’s the shower…even better…it’s the kitchen sink. Your dishes are being washed!!!

You were not only graciously laid, you didn’t even have to clean up after last night. 

Seriously awesome.

This is not an anomaly. It is happening.  I highly doubt it’s a regular thing, but it’s a thing. I have had experiences, and I know others that have. Their regular casual booties might straighten up the living room, clean up after the binge and /or do the dishes. 

Finding out how often this happens could be a great research project...right now I'm just calling it  an extension to my previous edition on Booty Call Etiquette. I guess it can be referred to as the Morning After Etiquette....yes...genius. (I am coining phrases that might never catch on....pass them on..!!)

Morning after etiquette works in all situations but its nice when there is a regular visitor (perhaps someone in your little black book) that cares enough to clean up after themselves on their way out. It could be their way of not leaving any evidence behind or their way of saying thanks for the bed. Maybe it's just a thanks for the sex. Whatever the case may be, they know they are on your list and that small gesture bumps them up to the top.

 Plus, at this point, it is a beneficial friends situation-- you only hang out when you want to have sex with them. Friends-with- Benefits puts the friend part first. In this situation the benefits come first. You call each other when horny and you go to dinner or just chill and watch movies...basically there are activities and then there is sex. The sex is going to come no matter what-- but you do stuff together to get the date going like true friends. 

Getting back to it..since your friendship is based on decent good times that happen occasionally, cleaning up the morning after should become a standard. It's not like you're sneaking out and hoping not to wake the person. You're planning on seeing this person again at some point. Make them want you back and, for those on the other side, use the morning after etiquette to rate your little black book. 

When casual sex is done right--all the way to the method of exiting the situation--then the beneficial friendship takes on a whole new 'no-strings-attached' level....a positive move. Single folk its time to make this a thing!!