Single on a Saturday: 3 am is a booty call not a boyfriend

I can't listen to any more young women talk about the love of their life, whom they really only see after the bar closes. They don't party together, they don't go on dates, they just wait to hook up at the end of the night. Folks this is not a boyfriend/significant other/soul mate...this is some dude who did not get lucky and is now calling you to fill a void.

There is nothing wrong with having friends with benefits. Let's face it, those are often the best friends in times of hunger. But do not get them confused with a dedicated heart felt relationship. You should not expect any commitment from the booty call and this person is not a potential life partner. Hell, this person is just an extended one night stand and in a few weeks/months/sessions you won't even call to them...or they won't care to call you.

That is when you just have to let it slide. Do not cry over them or fill up their voice mail and email with your whiny nonsense. Just go out to the bar and find a new one. In fact you should have one already set to go and a back up in the wings!!

Now I can lay down some sex therapist psychobabble, but I think it is safe to say that if someone only wants to see when they did not luck out at the bar then they are not seeking you for a long term monogamous caring relationship. This is about fucking. Just look at what surrounds the 3am booty call:
1. This person has been out drinking all night..possibly for 6 hours or more
2. Last call is at 2am and typically at this time all the in club booty hook ups complete
3. They didn't call you to come out or meet while out...they waited to call you at 3am!

Sometimes you just have to be glad for the commitment free sex. If you are not, then you need to be honest with yourself and start hunting for someone that suits those needs. Make this year to evaluate what you want from a relationship and how you will make that happen. Remember that bars are a great place to meet all sorts of people, but you gotta stay focused on your goals!!

Looking to get over your hangups? Here is a suggested read:

He's Just Not That Into You: Greg Behrendt, ‎Liz Tuccillo - 2007